Hot Hot Hot

It was so hot on December 23 that shorts and T-shirts were in order. I'm never living in Canada during the winter again!

On the First Day of Christmas...

It's almost Christmas and time for me to take a break. Here's one last festive photo pre-crimbo. I'm at Colonial Williamsburg where every single building has a unique Christmas wreath adorning it's door. This building was some kind of clothing shop with a rhinoceros sign hanging above my head. Maybe I'll go back when I'm in desperate need of something colonial, whenever that will be. Merry Christmas everyone! Have a wonderful holiday and fabulous New Year.

"All actual life is an encounter." Martin Buber

Countdown to Crimbo

The brightly lit Christmas tree was in front of the Osaka City Hall. It was one of the few trees I saw decorated in the city and was completely gone by December 26. The table full of gifts was my kitchen table on Christmas morning. I bought the tree at the Hundred Yen Store (aka Pound Store, Dollar Store, etc.) It cost something like Y300 which is like $4. I also bought lights and strung them up around the apartment and constantly listened to Christmas carols. Japan doesn't even remotely feel festive this time of year, but I did the best I could to make things jolly! The Japanese give gifts a lot. On one particular Saturday night, the doorbell rang and I was greeted with a couple who spoke zero English but had just moved into the apartment a couple of doors down. They had a gift for me, really expensive Lacoste facecloths. Apparently this is what you do when you move to a new neighbourhood in Japan, you go door to door handing out gifts to your neighbours and introduce yourself. I was stumped as to what to do and briefly considered giving them a couple of Canada flag pins. No luck though. We just bowed to each other and I said thanks. It was this experience that had me convinced my students would give me gifts on Christmas Day when I had to teach. Not happenin'. I didn't receive a single one. I was even so sad as to remind them that it was Christmas, hoping that would jog their memory and that they'd pull out a wrapped goodie for me. Nope. I guess I hadn't promoted it enough it class.

Heat Wave

Today it was 25 degrees outside, humid and sunny. I fell asleep in a lawn chair on the deck while trying to read my book. I woke up to the sound of birds flitting in and out of the bird feeders surrounding me. It's almost Christmas people! God Bless American weather!

Matt Mays and El Torpedo on Conan O'Brien - Fri 15th, 2006

BDay Celebrations

My birthday is always very festive being so close to Christmas. On top of eating a ridiculously huge cake, spending loads shopping and eating some truly delicious Italian food, I also went to the Lewis Ginter Botanical Gardens in Richmond. They're having a Christmas display of lights that stretch over the entire property. There were doll houses, miniature trains and lots of beautiful Christmas trees. Plus it was like 18 degrees outside, the warmest birthday weather I've ever experienced. I forget what snow looks like. I also have a drawer full of winter wear, mittens, scarves, hats I haven't touched in years. Hopefully I'll never have to wear them again!

Happy Birthday to Me

I'm a lot older than this now.

Tune In!

If you're anywhere near a TV tomorrow night and have access to NBC, you have to watch Late Night With Conan O'Brien. My friend Andy, the guy on the left in the group photo, is in the band Matt Mays and El Torpedo, and they're performing on Late Night! I'm so excited! And Sylvester Stallone is also a guest. Weird.

J-TV

The video below was pointed out to me by my friend Chuck. It's from a variety program in Japan. These are huge and are hosted by actors from different TV programs and commercials. The point of this game is the students are supposed to not laugh while watching a video of a guy trying to read English. If they laugh, they get smacked on the ass with a stick. It sounds really dumb and incredibly simple, but it's really funny. I saw skits like this a lot on Japanese TV. I saw one with three hot female celebrities who all ordered food from various takeout restaurants and when the delivery guy arrived, he had to answer correctly their trivia question. If he got it right, the girl who ordered the food would get to eat it. If not, a really overweight Japanese guy would eat it in front of her. Of course the delivery guys had no idea so it was kind of funny. I recommend watching J-TV. It's so ridiculous, it's good.

Learning English...The Hard Way

Santa-san

I took this photo outside my local KFC in Shin-Osaka. Almost every KFC I saw in Japan had a life sized likeness of Colonel Sanders and he was occasionally dressed up in different costumes. Turkey is incredibly difficult to find in Japan so most people go to KFC for a bucket of chicken for their Christmas dinner. We walked in the bitter cold to our KFC only to discover the staff standing outside the front doors, informing everyone that the wait for a 15 piece bucket was two hours. We decided to forgo the chicken and instead went out for yaki-niku (Korean BBQ). The waitresses were dresses up in slutty Mrs Claus outfits and the food was ridiculously expensive, but delicious. Christmas isn't a big deal in Japan since Buddism and Shinto are the predominant religions, however our uber consumerist holiday doesn't go unnoticed. Apparently Christmas is "for lovers" as I was told by several students, one of which asked me if I had a lover. Yikes. It's a day for couples of spend together and go out to dinner. Strange. Oh yeah, and everyone eats Christmas cake. Not the kind of Christmas cake I know, fruitcake, the stuff no one ever eats except my Mom, but actual cake with icing, but just given a festive name. We wandered home through some back streets, looking for signs of Christmas, or even a twinkling light or two, but alas it wasn't to be. The only festive sites we saw were even more slutty looking Mrs Clauses standing outside the numerous convenience stores, selling Christmas cake. The following morning we woke up to discover that every single Christmas decoration in the city had been taken down and replaced with New Year's decorations. Ah, Santa-san...where did you go?

Re-Enact This

Yeah, so Colonial Williamsburg, what can I say? Yet again, another colonial town in Virginia, steeped in history, blah, blah, blah. Can you tell I'm getting bored? Yes the British lost, yes Ameica grew to be the largest superpower in the world, and yes we got pulled over by the cops for making a wrong turn. Oops. That was the most interesting part of the day, especially when we were given a ticket. Thanks Officer Asshead. Nice to know taxpayers money isn't being spent on solving crimes and making our cities safer, but being spent so you can sit on your ass, eating donuts and harrassing motorists. Good for you. Oh yeah, Colonial Williamsburg was nice and festive. I've just seen way too many re-enactors for my liking. My fav (sarcasm) was the dick at Appomattox who in his Civil War gear said in a thick hick accent that the little lady at the end of the isle (me) looked like she wanted to be somewhere else. I did, so I said yes, you colonial ass! You're just actors who can't get real work. Sorry.

Marshmallow World

Tonight I went for the first time to Stony Point Fashion Park in Richmond. It's this outdoor, kind of posh, dog friendly shopping mall. Most of the stores are high end like Saks Fifth Avenue and Louis Vutton but the place is littered with dogs and doggie comfort stations. These are rest areas for dogs complete with communal water dishes. A lot of the stores are pet friendly and have little signs low enough for the dogs to read, welcoming them. Since Christmas is coming, the place was decked out in beautiful lights and carols were playing. There's a tiny ice skating area where you can rent skates and waltz around, but next to the rink is a massive Christmas tree, completely covered in colourful lights and ornaments. Lots of people were there with their kids and pets, getting their pictures taken, but I was there for a completely different reason. At 7pm every night, Stony Point Fashion Park has snow. Manufactured snow to be precise. At seven on the dot, a whirring sound started coming from the top of the buildings around the tree and snowflakes started to shoot out of the unseen ducts and onto the squealing children below. Everyone was smiling and hoping around in the 'snow'. Sure, it was fake snow and it only went on for about 10 minutes and kind of looked like soap bubbles when it landed on my coat, but it was really festive and kind of beautiful. I've seen the real thing every year of my life, but here in Virginia where snow isn't that common, it was nice to see something so wholesome and simple make so many people happy. God, was that sugary or what?

You'd Better Not Pout, You'd Better Not Cry...

Love Hotels in Japan are an incredibly unique phenomenon. They're small "theme" hotels that offer couples the chance to spend some "quality alone time" together. You can either pay for a Stay ( a few hours) or a Rest (overnight). Osaka is the mecca for such hotels in Japan, but of course I had no idea what they were when I arrived. I thought there was just an overabundance of cleverly named hotels in town, like Hotel Happiness, Hotel Relaxation, Hotel Rose Lips and Hotel Purple Eye (insert joke here). Once I realised what they were, it was like they were everywhere. This particular picture is of a Christmas themed Love Hotel in Umeda. Check out Santa and the power thrusting he's doing. Yikes. Some of these places have hot tubs, Playstations, heart shaped beds, karaoke machines and the list goes on. It's kinda like the honeymoon suites available in Vegas, but so much more than that. I found one just down the road from my school that had an Anne of Green Gables theme. The sign states, "Anne's Dream". But really, was it? Did Anne really dream of having a few hours of fun in a dingy hotel on some back alley of Uehommachi, Osaka?

Random J-Shot

I don't have any real reason for putting this photo up, except I've been scanning every single photo I've ever taken and am now working my way through my year in Japan. This is Himmeji Castle in Himmeji, Japan. It's about an hour train ride from Osaka. It's been called the most beautiful castle in Japan. It was really interesting, definitely unlike the European castles I'm partial to. The most intriguing part of the castle was an area called the 'Suicide Room'. Apparently that's where warriors would go to end their lives. I also learned that ninjas weren't the fighters they've been portrayed to be on TV. They were actually spies. There was a place called Ninjatown in the area and guests could go to Ninja School for the day. I never did end up going, but man, what mad skills those would be to put on a resume! Under skills: leaping from tree branches while battling my enemy single-handed with a samurai sword.

Twinkle Lights

Tonight I went to see The Grand Illumination in downtown Richmond. As a Canadian, it's really bizarre to be in a place so warm in December. It's usually either freezing rain every other day, or at least below zero, but today I was outside in a short-sleeve t-shirt, while I watched neighbours walk by wearing winter hats. I guess their idea of cold and mine is quite different. Anyhow, the city of Richmond has this Grand Illumination where the high-rise buildings downtown are outlined in white lights and there's a small park in the center of this area full of trees, reindeer, and wreaths all done up in white lights. It's really beautiful but I felt like I should have at least been wearing mittens or a scarf. I've got a closet full of winter gear just itching to get out. Fingers crossed I can leave it where it lays. The only other thing I've seen recently that comes close to this is the City Hall light display in Osaka, Japan. It's next to a river and looked quite beautiful with the lights bouncing off the water. I was brought back to earth though by the stalls of hot dogs, takoyaki (balls of fried octopus), and noodles all calling out for customers. I had a hot dog on a stick and then watched the same vendor who sold me the dog pick his ears with one of the sticks used to sell his delicious treat on. I pray to God that was the only stick he stuck in his mangy ear and that it didn't come anywhere near the food. And they talk about people getting weird parasites and infections from third world countries!

Ooo Ta Goo Ta Solo?

I've never seen the fabled Star Wars Christmas Special, but I guess the video below is the closest I'll ever come to seeing it. I wasn't actually looking for Star Wars videos, just kind of stumbled across it. I love everything about it, especially Jaba wearing a scarf and R2-D2 wearing antlers. It's brilliant and very clever!

In a Galaxy Far, Far Away...