First Day of Junior Kindergarten, Age 3

This is my all-time favourite picture of myself. For anyone who knows my personality, I think this picture says it all.

Still Breathing

For anyone wondering about my sanity, I apparently still have the ability to smile despite everything.

End of it

For those of your unaware of what's been happening in my life recently, here's a quick run down. My marriage as of August 2004 fell apart in September 2004 and Brian and I separated. We've been separated since which would make it almost two years at this point. He's been living in Japan ever since and I came back to Canada in June of 2005 to eventually move to Ireland that September. Being married didn't really affect either one of us, so we just remained so. However Brian has been exhaustively looking into how to get divorced for the last few months. I was trying to help as best as I could but for me, being married at this point hadn't affected my life in any way. Until now.

I applied for and accepted my job in London solely based on the information I was given by the travel agent who had orginally given me my Irish working holiday visa. She assured me that I could come back to Canada, apply for the same visa for the UK despite my maritial status and that I would be granted a visa with no problems. She didn't do her job and check to make sure I was eligible for a working holiday visa and when I tried to apply I was informed that because I am still married, unless my husband comes with me to the UK, then my visa won't be approved. I stood at the counter of this travel office, crying my eyes out, hyperventilating and repeating the name of the company that had hired me. I had no sympathy from the employee and was told to do some research. She also added a cursory, 'these things happen', which, if I had been in the right frame of mind, would have caused me to launch at her from across the counter and smash her face off her keyboard. Fortunately for her, I was numb and couldn't focus on anything. The sole reason why I've lost my job and everything has fallen apart is because of the original employee who didn't do her job and screwed me out of an amazing opportunity.

The reason why this company wanted me to apply for the visa myself is that the Home Office in the UK has six schemes of work permit employment and I don't fit under any. Even if the company was to be generous enough to go ahead with applying for a work permit, it wouldn't be approved as the position I've been offered is an entry level one and could be easily filled by someone living in the UK. If however this was still to go ahead without any problems from the Home Office, there's always the issue of my separation and when my visa application is given to the High Commission in Ottawa, it most likely would be turned down because I'm still married. The company was looking to have me start somewhere around August 14. To spend any more time trying to apply for visas, which would take several more weeks and ultimately wouldn't be approved, would be a misuse of time and resources. The position needed to be filled by someone who could immediately slide into the job without any hassle and unfortunately that person isn't me.

As Brian is staying put in Japan, ultimately I have to stay in Canada for one year to fulfill the one year separation obligations necessary to start my divorce. I always knew this was going to happen but didn't think it would have to be me. Obviously any type of employment in the UK is out of the question now because of my marriage, and on top of that, I've given up 2.5 months of a perfectly valid Irish visa, a great apartment and friends.

I know that I have to live in Canada for a year but I'm just not ready to do that. I'll be going back to the UK for a visit next week and will spend some type relaxing, enjoying life and visiting family friends. It's the end of my dream job for now but hopefully in the future something better will come up...although I can't imagine what that would be.

I don't want to talk about this anymore.

Safe Arrival

Well I arrived in Toronto in one piece, no thanks to British Airways and AerLingus, yesterday evening around 7:30. Despite some woman trying to pick up my suitcase at arrivals, and a serious case of plane sickness, I met my granparents and they whisked me off to their palatial penthouse in Mississauga. The weather here is very humid and warm, but a welcome change from the dreary rain and dampness of Dublin.

I had an incredibly relaxing sleep, got up at 7:30 and went to the local Travel Cuts to apply for my visa. The UK visa requires a bit more legwork than the one for Ireland so I had to get a passport photo, I have to go to the bank to get two letters tomorrow and then I can officially apply on Thursday. I'm really looking forward to getting back over to London and getting set up. I'm trying to have nothing but positive thoughts concerning my visa and hopefully everything will run smoothly. I'm excited to start my new job but I'm more excited about getting back over to England and being with loved ones. It's the start of a great new chapter of my life and I can't wait to turn the page and dive in!

Ragin'

I've evolved into a kinder, gentler Meaghan over the last year. I think being on my own, travelling and living in Dublin has helped. However, all that calm, peaceful attitude went out the window this morning when I tried to check in for my flight. I'm SUPPOSED to be on an AerLingus flight to London right now, but I'm actually sitting on my ever expanding ass waiting to check into a 12:10 flight, thereby royally F*&%$£G up my schedule!!! Thanks British Airways for lying to me and telling me that I was all set to go then being a bunch of jackasses that you couldn't even change a simple flight. Oh, and thank you to the cranky ass bitchy old hag behind the AerLingus counter who yelled at me for using the word 'they' when trying to refer to British Airways. Old Meaghan isn't back for good but she made a sour little reappearance this morning. British Airways/AerLingus 1 - Meaghan 0.